personal geographies
I grew up in Malaysia, went to university in England to study Law (and some History), spent a handful of seasons in Latin America, returned to Malaysia, and more recently began an acquaintance with Germany. These days, you’ll find me in Berlin or Kuala Lumpur. I remain ever curious about all the places I’ve been and all the places I’ve never been.
And I’ve realised: Even as other places better express my desires, Malaysia remains my emotional anchor, even when I resist it, when I want to get away. You know that opening scene from Gone Baby Gone? Something about how it’s the things you don’t choose that make you who you are? My restlessness has never been about finding somewhere ‘better’ to be. I’ve found something to enjoy about every place I’ve been and grow nostalgic for them when I’ve left.
But before I ever traversed physical distances, I wandered even further between the pages of books: The Call of the Wild, Moby Dick, The Secret Garden, Great Expectations, The Hound of the Baskervilles… and let’s not forget the Mandarin-language audio tapes of hair-raising Chinese fairytales my mum got me, which I would listen to at bedtime with the covers pulled over my head. How could a child raised on such vicarious adventures not grow up with a deep, abiding longing to be out in the world?
mother tongues, adopted tongues
Like many Malaysians of Chinese descent whose families have lived for generations in Malaysia, English is my first language (it’s the one I’m most proficient in—British colonisation and all that). I studied at a Chinese-language primary school and grew up learning Mandarin, Malay, and English, with Mandarin as the main language of instruction (as in: History, Geography, Math, etc. were taught in Mandarin). Following that, I enrolled in a secondary school where Malay was the main language of instruction, then headed abroad to university in England, where English was of course the medium of instruction.
Throughout these years, I read mainly English-language books and watched English-language movies (more American than British, such was the power of American global hegemony), which explains my dominant proficiency in the language. But being multilingual has helped me ease my way into different geographical and cultural contexts, which has been helpful on both a personal and professional level. I also speak Spanish, though not as fluently as I once did, and I’m currently taking B1-level German.
JOY IS NOT A CRUMB
When I’m not writing or reading at my desk, I like to walk and wander the city and eavesdrop on strangers’ conversations, picnic and play boardgames at a park, lose myself in a movie I can’t catch online at some quaint cinema, sit in and listen to the exchange of ideas at literary/storytelling events, partake in communal eating experiences and what’s new in vegan food possibilities, swing dance in some tavernous bar or vintage ballhaus, and travel somewhere I love or haven’t been. Some of these things still apply back in Kuala Lumpur—but back at my parents’, I’d also get to spend time with our two dogs 🩵